She stood out in the rain with the needle-like drops stinging her chilled skin. Even though she knew she should step back into the house, she wanted to have the remnants of the argument washed from her. The rain, however painful, felt like a cleansing sweeping away harsh words flung in anger and statements made that can never be retaken. The snide remarks had become a quiet buzz in her life, something mildly annoying but not within her conscious attention. Tonight's argument had been something different. Never before had she heard the vitriol that had spewed forth from her mother's lips. One comment in particular caught her attention. Although it was the least foul of those uttered, it struck as an arrow direct to her heart.
"You're a bad daughter," her mother had screamed.
A bad daughter, she thought. I've spent my life doing whatever she asked. I have not doing things or gone where I wanted to go because she needed me. How can I be a bad daughter? I'm the one who stayed. My life has been about her. I didn't take vacations because she thought they were risky. I refrained from getting braces because she thought they would be a waste. I had no romantic relationships for years because she wanted me at home. When I could finally move, I stayed close in town because she needed me to drive her places. So much has been for her and yet I'm a bad daughter for wanting a weekend for myself instead of taking her shopping?
She continued to stand in the rain, and though her skin grew icy, her heart began to warm with anger and bitterness. So much of my life, she thought, so much of my life dedicated to family. What has it brought me? Insults and loneliness. There has been no space in my life for me only for one who has no respect for who I am. Why should I listen? Why should I stay? Why...
Suddenly she stopped and went slack-jawed in surprise. Why should I stay? That thought had never crossed her mind before. She thought, I could leave. There is money stored up both from work and from Aunt Edith. I could have a life of my own.
Freedom.
The laughter that burbled up could not have been stopped. Head back and arms outstretched, she twirled in the rain and laughed with glee.
To be continued...
