The Bad Influence Speaks

6.30 Hump Day Quote: Joss Whedon

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the road less traveled by and they CANCELLED MY FRIKKIN' SHOW. I totally shoulda took the road that had all those people on it. Damn.

-Joss Whedon

Leverage: The Reunion Job

Season 3, Episode 2

With Nate back in the saddle, so to speak, the team takes on a client working for the resistance in Iran. To shut down the program blocking protesters and keeping him from his family, the has nothing left to do but steal a reunion.

Nate: What? Are you lurking?
Eliot: Yeah. I'm a lurker. This is my thing.

 

Parker: For a den of evil spies, this place smells delicious. Hardison, confiscate some pastries.

 

Hardison: This man has become the IT department for the axis of evil.

 

Eliot: So get to hacking man.
Hardison: Dude, what is it about wrote the book on database security you don't understand?

 

Parker: Is that a good beep or a bad beep?
Hardison: Oh, that's a bad beep.

 

Hardison: You know, it's real cute, man, that you still believe in privacy.

 

Eliot: Getting bullied in high school is no excuse for propping up dictators.

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Leverage: The Jailhouse Job

Season 3, Episode 1

The team plans to break Nate out of prison but he has a job to take care of first.

Parker: *snort* Uh...uh...Yes, I'm a go for elevator 1.
Hardison: You asleep?
Parker: It's very peaceful up here. Besides, I sleep better upside down.

Billy: You stabbed me.
Nate: Just a little. Oh, come on, it'll be fine.

Eliot: Do exactly what I say. I'm going to get you home alive. Ok?

Hardison: You see. I like this. I like when we pretend to kiss.
Parker: Pretend?

Sophie: She's blackmailing us?
Nate: Uh...she's...she's...she's...uh...sort of. Yeah.
Parker: Sucks to be on the wrong side of that finally

Sophie: So how's that going for you?
Nate: This? Thanks for asking. It's good. You know what, I realized is that I tried being a drunk honest man, a sober thief, so I'm going to try being a drunk thief. Try that for a little while. You're not going to try to save me, are you?
Sophie: You're a thief now. You can save yourself.

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Eureka: You Don't Know Jack

Season 3, Episode 16

Jack and Allison become trapped in GD right before a scheduled sonic cleaning and Allison goes into labor. Unfortunately, the citizens of Eureka are losing their memories and might not remember they are there.

Allison: Carter, that pager has an encrypted signal that could reach you in a cave in China, but only if you don't lose it.

Jack: Tell me the fail safe didn't just fail.

Henry: Mistakes make the exceptional possible.

Jack: Why is everything such overkill with you people?

Jack: Allison, we're about the be vibrated to death and not in a good way.

Tess: Hi, I'm Tess and you are?
Jack: Totally screwed.

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Eureka: Shower the People

Season 3, Episode 15

Allison's baby shower is a rousing success but afterwords the attendees spring a fatal leak.

Tess: They would eat their own young if they thought it would impress you.

Allison: Is there something wrong?
Jack: No, I'm...uh...yeah. My back hurts. My ankles are sore. It feels like my organs are up in my lungs. I'm going to ....*clears throat*...I don't know how you do it.

Jack: Yeah, I tend not to do that in public.
Tess: Maybe you should start.

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Leverage: The Ice Man Job

Season 2, Episode 8

While Sophie take a break, the Leverage team moves on without her. Their new case is preventing a jewelry store owner from profiting from stealing his own diamonds but with Hardison as the front man, things can easily go wrong.

Eliot: I had courtside seats, man. Tell Hardison if he makes it out alive, I'm going to snap him in half.
Nate: Eliot says "hi."

Eliot: What you smiling at? You still screwed it up.
Hardison: I'm smiling because you said if I got in trouble you wouldn't help me.
Eliot: Parker made me.
Parker: No, I didn't.
Hardison: Come on, man. Let's hug it out.
Eliot: I'm not hugging it out, Ice Man.

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Friday Patriotics: Dwight D Eisenhower

People talk about the middle of the road as though it were unacceptable. Actually, all human problems, excepting morals, come into gray areas. Things are not all black and white. There have to be compromises. The middle of the road is all of the usable surface. The extremes, right and left, are in the gutters.

-Dwight D. Eisenhower

Leverage: The Two Live Crew Job

Season 2, Episode 7

When attempting to reacquire a painting for a client, the Leverage team runs into another team after the painting. How will things go when the teams go head to head? Wil Wheaton guest stars.

Hardison: It's easier to hack a wall than a high tech security system.

Sophie: Oh, Parker, please don't poke at the motion sensitive bomb.

Hardison: We trust Nate to make sure the plan works. We trust you to make sure we're all ok.

Hardison: They call him the Kobayashi Maru.

Hardison: You were scared to fight a girl.
Eliot: She'd mop the floor with you, Hardison.
Hardison: I don't care.
Eliot: Seriously. She actually killed a guy once with a mop. It's a funny story actually.

Hardison: Can't hack a classic.

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6.23 Hump Day Quote: Eureka (Sheriff Carter)

I think what we've been experiencing is random acts of gravity.

-Sheriff Jack Carter (Colin Ferguson), Eureka (Welcome Back, Carter)

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Leverage: The Top Hat Job

Season 2, Episode 6

A large food conglomerate has a problem in their frozen foods department with contaminated entrees that are being hidden. Time for the team to swoop in and make the problem disappear.

Hardison: Eliot, what is that blocking your button cam? Oh, that's your ego.

 

Hardison: Where do you think my intel comes from? For the last time, there is no blueprint fairy.

 

Hardison: You can tell someone worked for the CIA just by how they stand?
Eliot: It's a very distinctive stance.

 

Eliot: Does anyone want to do my job? Huh? I get punched and kicked.

 

Hardison: Uh-0h.
Eliot: Uh-oh? What do you mean uh-oh? Oh, that uh-oh.

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